Latrell Sprewell Pressured Into Trying Marijuana

MINNEAPOLIS, MN - “Just one hit,” they said at the party, and that was all it took for Latrell Sprewell to do the unthinkable. The Timberwolves star inhaled from a marijuana cigarette for the first time in his life, and is wracked with guilt about it. Sprewell was so ashamed at succumbing to the peer pressure that he missed yesterday’s practice. He reportedly spent the day “reflecting” and consulting with the team’s pastor.

“It’s just something I never thought I’d do,” said a contrite Sprewell during a telephone interview last night. “As you all know, I hold myself to an incredibly high standard of behavior, and I carry myself with a certain quiet dignity, so this slip-up really threw me for a loop. I don’t know what got into me. I guess I never should’ve had those three wine coolers. The whole party was a blur after that.”

The incident occurred at a party thrown by friend and business partner Josh Brown, vice-president of And 1 Apparel, Sprewell’s sneaker company. Brown reportedly invited friends and family over to his posh Chicago penthouse to watch the playoff matchup between Carolina and St. Louis, but things quickly got out of hand.

“Spree will only come to a party if he’s assured there will be no drug use,” said Brown. “He also insists that there be no women of ‘loose morals.’ I told him I’d do what I could, but I can’t control everyone that comes over. After all, it is a party.”

According to witnesses, a group of uninvited guests arrived at the party around midnight. They claimed to be old friends of Brown, and immediately asked if it was OK to light a marijuana cigarette.

“I know those guys,” said Brown. “They’re a little rough around the edges, but they’re harmless. I told Spree to loosen up a little, you know? He seemed really concerned about a contact high, so I gave him a few wine coolers and told him to relax. That was a mistake.”

After consuming three Seagram’s Wild Margarita wine coolers, Spree let his hair down and began mingling with the other guests, including the ones who were smoking marijuana in the corner.

“I don’t remember a whole lot, but I definitely loosened up a little,” Sprewell said. “I’m not a big drinker, and I suppose 3 was a little excessive. But I didn’t want to be a wet towel. I wanted to show that I could party, too. I guess that’s why they call it peer pressure.”

Initially the men were aloof, but once they realized they were talking to an NBA star, they grew excited and offered Sprewell some pot.

“I was so flattered that they were fans,” recounted Sprewell. “I didn’t want to let them down, so I ignored everything my mom ever told me about the dangers of drug use, and all the public service announcements I’d seen over the years, and just did it. At first I didn’t feel anything. I was like ‘This is it? Ha. This is nothing.’ But then they told me I needed to inhale really hard, so it got into my lungs. Well, once I did that, forget about it. After I got through coughing up a lung, I became so sick that I had to rush into the bathroom and throw up. I passed out in there, and then woke up in the morning realizing what I’d done. My God, what have I done?”

That morning, Sprewell phoned coach Flip Saunders and informed him that he would not be attending practice.

“He told me he was going to stay home and do some soul searching,” said Saunders. “Then later on in the day, I found out about the marijuana thing. I dropped down to one knee and wept. Of all the people in the world that would try drugs, Latrell is the last person I’d suspect. It just goes to show you the frailty of the human psyche, and how susceptible we all are to temptation.”

Teammate Kevin Garnett called Sprewell and offered comfort and support, telling his friend to use the incident as a learning experience.

“What doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger,” said Garnett. “Spree is a beautiful, morally strong, upstanding citizen, but he’s not perfect. He’s human like all of us – imperfect, confused, vulnerable, beautiful – human. And he will get through this, because he’s got a lot of friends on this team who care about him.”

At press time, media reports of the drug incident were just trickling in, but experts predict an avalanche of publicity and scandal stemming from the shocking revelation.

“Latrell Sprewell? Smoking pot? The NBA has truly lost its innocence,” said Marc Stein, NBA analyst. “This makes the Kobe Bryant thing seem trivial by comparison. I mean, the Kobe thing was a surprise, but nothing like this. It really makes you stop and think. If Spree can try weed, anything can happen in this topsy-turvey world.”

Phil Taylor of Sports Illustrated hopes the media will support Sprewell instead of hanging him out to dry.

“I know a lot of people are going to be bashing him. That’s just the way our society is. Someone falls down, and we kick them instead of trying to help them up. Everyone knows that Latrell is a giver, a person who spends his off-days reading to the elderly and working at a soup kitchen. And he once lifted a car off a child. I know, because it was my car. Fucking kid had it coming though. He ran right out into the street.”

Sprewell insists that he is not afraid of the media backlash, but he is concerned about his status as a role model.

“I know that lots of kids in America look up to me,” he said. “And I know they will be asking their parents why I would do something like this, and that’s just something I’m going to have to overcome. My biggest concern is that pot is a ‘gateway drug.’ Will I go on to use harder drugs? Will I succumb once more to the pressure of trying to be ‘cool’ and ‘hip?’ I pray that I don’t, but as Jean-Paul Sartre famously said ‘We do not know what we want and yet we are responsible for what we are.’ Truer words were never spoken – I learned that the hard way.”