MINNEAPOLIS--Following their 35-17 rout of the San Diego Chargers, Minnesota Vikings players admitted they were embarrassed for their opponent, who gave up 35 points to one of the league’s worst offenses and actually made Brooks Bollinger look halfway decent.

“Whoa, that was pretty bad,” said Vikings safety Dwight Smith. “They lost to a team that can’t string together two complete passes. And they lost by18 points! Talk about embarrassing yourself. I was embarrassed for them. I actually felt uncomfortable watching the second half of that game. It’s excruciating to see someone hit rock bottom like that on national television. You almost want to reach out and give them a hug.”

Bollinger himself offered some words of encouragement to the Chargers, whom he described as “super talented.”

“Those guys are a great team,” he said after the game. “Tonight they just um…forgot how to play football. It happens. One time I was in middle school and I had to do a presentation in front of the class and I got so nervous I forgot how to talk. So I just stood there in silence for 10 minutes, then when I tried to go back to my desk, I forgot how to walk and fell down. My classmates were so embarrassed for me. It was awful. Anyway, my point is you can put that stuff behind you with a shitload of medication.”

Coach Brad Childress was stunned that his team came away with a 18-point victory.

“Jesus, who knew we could beat these guys?” he asked. “Who knew we could beat anybody? Who knew we could even put points on the board? This is a really proud day for our franchise. We worked hard and were rewarded for it. As for the other team, well, they played…good. They have nothing to be ashamed of except for everything between the first and fourth quarters.”

The Chargers came into the weekend on a three-game winning streak and figured to have an easy time against the overmatched Vikings. However, the Vikings’ defense, combined with Adrian Peterson’s 296 rushing yards, proved to be too much for San Diego.

On the other hand, LaDainian Tomlinson finished with only 40 yards on the ground.

“I don’t know what happened,” said Tomlinson. “I thought we were going to win this game big. We are way more talented than those losers. Plus, we’ve been on a hot streak lately. We got our swagger back. Our swagger! How can we lose a game when we have swagger? I don’t get it. Everything I’ve learned about football is wrong.”

Tomlinson did say the Vikings had no reason to feel embarrassed for them.

“They don’t need to feel embarrassed for us,” he said. “It’s just a loss. We’ll move on from this and learn from it. There's no shame in losing to a team like that anyway. They have some good players. Well, one or two. Maybe three. Okay, there is shame in it.”

Vikings players then got wind of Tomlinson’s comments and posted them on the bulletin board for to motivate them for this week's ga me..

Copyright 2007, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

Email Button Print screen button

 

 

         

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 





Vikings Embarrassed For Chargers After Beating Them

November 6 , 2007 Volume 2 Issue 117
StubHub.com is the place to find all Baseball Tickets, including New York Mets Tickets, New York Yankees Tickets, Minnesota Twins Tickets and Florida Marlins Tickets. Buy or Sell your Tickets today.