Peter Gammons Trades Alex Rodriguez To Red Sox

BOSTON, MA - According to a report by ESPN.com, Peter Gammons has finally pulled the trigger on a deal sending Alex Rodriguez to the Boston Red Sox in exchange for left fielder Manny Ramirez. Gammons, reportedly fed up with the indecisiveness from both camps, decided late last night to close the deal himself. Sources from both teams say they're a bit surprised, yet relieved that the deal is done and they can finally focus on spring training.

“Peter called me and told me that Hicks had agreed to the deal,” said Sox owner John Henry, who would not budge from his original proposal. “He said that Hicks was willing to trade A-Rod for Manny straight up, with no additional cash considerations or future prospects. That was what we were looking for all along. I jumped at it.”

Henry said he had not spoken to Hicks and was unsure why the Texas owner change his mind.

“Last time I talked to Tom, he was pretty adamant about his demands,” said Henry. “He wanted us to pay a portion of Manny’s salary and also send a couple of prospects. He didn’t seem like he wanted to budge from that at all. But for whatever reason, he did. As for Nomar, I’m sure he’ll enjoy his new home in Los Angeles”

A-Rod was informed of the move by Gammons himself, who phoned the Texas star at his home.

“He just told me to pack my bags, because I was going to Boston,” said A-Rod. “I was shocked. I thought the deal was dead, but Gammons assured me it was on. He sounded pretty psyched about it, too. He finally has the story he’s been dying to tell for the past three months.”

Tom Hicks was also informed by Gammons, the driving force behind the deal.

“Peter called me and told me that the Red Sox had agreed to all my demands,” said Hicks in a telephone interview from his home in Arlington. “He said that they were willing to part with a couple of very promising young prospects as well as pay some of Manny’s salary. He also said they’d throw in a few cases of fresh New England lobsters, just to be good sports. That John Henry sure is a great guy. It’s been a pleasure doing business with him.”

Even Nomar Garciaparra is happy with the deal. The Sox shortstop said Gammons contacted him last night and informed him that Rodriguez has agreed to play third base for the Red Sox and that the team was intent on keeping both players.

“Wow, this couldn’t have turned out better,” said Garciaparra. “I get to stay in Boston, which is something I’ve always wanted to do, plus I get to keep my shortstop position. And the team is going to be great with A-Rod in the mix. 2004 could be our year.”

Several baseball sources are questioning exactly how the deal got done. Gammons may be the nation’s preeminent sports reporter, but he’s no GM, and he does not have the authorization to make trades for any team. Those same sources are questioning the conflicting reports coming out of both Texas and Boston.

“Let me get this straight,” said Tom Verducci, senior baseball writer for Sports Illustrated. “The Red Sox have agreed to pay some of Manny’s salary and send a couple of prospects to the Rangers, and the Rangers have agreed to drop all their demands and make the trade straight up. Well, which is it? I think someone is fucking with someone big time.”

A-Rod’s agent, Scott Boras, refused to comment on speculation that the deal might have been rigged by Gammons, but indicated his client is thrilled to be the newest member of the Boston Red Sox.

“Alex is looking forward to playing shortstop for the Boston Red Sox in 2004 and beyond,” said Boras. “My client has sacrificed monetary gain to fulfill his desire to be on a winning ballclub. We wish Nomar Garciaparra the best of luck with his new team, the Chicago White Sox, and we’d like to thank Peter Gammons for making this whole deal possible. Alex has already packed his bags and is on his way to Boston.”

When reached for comment, White Sox GM Kenny Williams had this to say:

“Huh? What the hell are you talking about? There’s no deal. Nomar isn’t coming here. I heard he was staying in Boston to play third base while Alex takes over at short. But then someone said Nomar was going to stay at short and Alex was moving to third. Then I heard something about the Dodgers. I don’t know. This sounds like the handiwork of Peter Gammons. But if anyone can get the deal done, it’s him.”

At press time, Rodriguez was on a charter jet to Boston to meet with his new owner, John Henry, as well as Larry Luccino and Theo Epstein. Garciaparra, who is in Boston this week, was also on his way to meet with the Sox brass. However, there seemed to be some confusion over the nature of the meeting.

“I’m going to meet Alex,” Garciaparra said. “I’m going to welcome him to the Red Sox. We’re gonna make a kick-ass double play combination, that’s for sure.”

But Luccino has indicated that Garciaparra is being flown in to be informed of the trade.

“Well yes, Nomar is on his way here. That part is certainly true,” said Luccino. “We’re going to inform him that he’s on his way to the Dodgers. According to Peter, the Dodgers have agreed to take Nomar for Odalis Perez, which will really shore up our bullpen. Nomar will take it like a professional, I’m sure. Whew. Thank God for Peter Gammons, though, or none of this would be happening.”

Gammons himself will make the rounds on the nation’s radio and television shows to discuss how he orchestrated the miracle deal. The trade should keep sportswriters and sports fans buzzing for weeks to come.