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NEW YORK--After relinquishing a seven game division lead in the final eighteen games of the season, the bickering New York Mets were pointing fingers at everybody but themselves. Some blamed manager Willie Randolph for his lack of leadership, and others blamed pitching coach Rick Petersen for his inability to communicate, but the most pointed barbs were reserved for the Philadelphia Phillies, who won 13 of their last 17 games to steal the division from the Mets.

“The won, what, 13 of their last 17? That’s ridiculous,” said catcher Paul Lo Duca. “If they’re going to win almost every game we’re not going to have much of a chance to hold onto the division lead, especially when we’re in a rut. I’m not trying to lay the blame on anybody, but you look at the facts and the circumstances here and wonder if things could have been different. All I know is there are going to be some major changes in our clubhouse next year - though it would probably be more helpful to us if there were changes in the Phillies’ clubhouse.”

Lo Duca pointed the finger specifically at the Phillies’ pitching staff, which suddenly learned how to pitch in the final month of the season.

“The consistency in their pitching staff just wasn’t there,” he said. “They hovered between mediocre and bad for most of the season and then at the end they became effective. Jamie Moyer is 800 years old and he got the win in their last game. That’s not going to get it done. And what’s with this Cole Hamels kid? He’s suddenly a staff ace? Fuck him. We’re the New York Mets. He’s just a baby. Kids today have no respect for their veteran peers.”

Billy Wagner, the Mets’ outspoken closer, had plenty to say following the team’s 8-1 loss to the Marlins that completed the collapse. Among other things, he blamed the Phillies for putting “too much pressure” on the Mets in the final weeks of the season.

“I’m not making excuses or anything, but it’s pretty hard for any team to play under that kind of pressure,” said Wagner. “You go out there every day knowing that the team behind you won, and that you’ve got basically no margin for error, and it starts to wear on you. Everyone’s pushing, everyone’s pressing and every game becomes like Game 7 of the World Series. Even our own manager was nervous. You could tell by the way his facial expression changed slightly in the middle of September.”

Randolph has been criticized in some circles for his passive, hands-off approach to managing the team in the midst of the Phillies’ onslaught. Many Mets players were hoping for some kind of outburst or temper tantrum from Randolph, which never came.

“It would have been nice to see Willie go nuts and smash some Gatorade coolers or something,” said one player, who asked not to be identified. “Remember when the Yankees were in the toilet earlier this season and everyone was saying they were finished? What did Joe Torre do? Exactly. He trashed the clubhouse and got in a fist fight with Hideki Matsui. If he just sat there passively, they never would have rebounded they way they did.”

On Tuesday, Lo Duca apologized for criticizing the Phillies and instead pointed the finger at himself and his teammates for blowing the NL East.

“I’m sorry that it came out like that,” Lo Duca said. “I didn’t mean to imply that the Phillies were at fault for this whole collapse. I was just venting and I let my emotions get the best of me. The truth is, all of the fault lies with the people in our clubhouse. The players, coaches, trainers, clubhouse boys, maintenance men, even the security guards. We all have to shoulder the blame. Otherwise people will think we’re throwing each other under the bus.”

Copyright 2007, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

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Finger-Pointing Mets Blame Collapse On Phillies

October 2 , 2007 Volume 2 Issue 112
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