BERLIN, GERMANY--Seeking to mimic the success of Major League Baseball’s World Baseball Classic, FIFA, the international governing body of soccer, has announced plans to hold its own “World Cup” which will take place this summer in Germany. Surprisingly, baseball officials said they have no problem with FIFA stealing their idea.

“We give our blessing to the FIFA's or whatever they’re called,” said Bob Dupuy, Chief Operating Officer of Major League Baseball. “Hopefully their tournament goes as well as ours. It’s nice to see smaller, niche sports trying to mimic our success. Maybe this will put soccer on the map.”

The announcement of a World Baseball Classic was greeted with skepticism initially, with some wondering how a tournament involving so many different nations could possibly work. But the skeptics were silenced when it went off without a hitch. Now the organizers have some words of advice for FIFA.

“Make sure you start planning early, because a lot of things can go wrong,” said Dupuy. “Travel arrangements, VISA’s, accommodations, security – there’s just so much to think about that it can get overwhelming. The FIFA would be wise to study exactly how we did it to avoid any potential pratfalls. It’s not going to be easy for them, especially with a sport that only appeals to little kids.”

The soccer version of the World Baseball Classic will take place between June 9 and July 9. The 32 teams will be divided into groups of 4 and will play until only 1 remains standing. The winner will be given the FIFA World Cup Trophy.

“They’ve done a great job of taking our blueprint and adapting it to their own sport,” said players union chief Donald Fehr. “They’ve got the round robin thing and the single elimination thing, and they’ve even got their own little trophy. I guess you could call it sort of a poor man’s WBC. I just hope they follow our lead in other areas as well, like marketing. It would behoove them to start some kind of website and maybe buy some advertising time on television to get the word out. You can reach a lot of people that way. ”

Fehr also recommended that FIFA spend more time promoting the players and personalities that will take part in the tournament.

“They could also stand to promote their players a bit,” he continued. “I’ve never heard of any of the people on these rosters. Dida? Pauleta? David Beckham? Are these made-up names? I’ve only heard of one soccer player in my life, and her name is Mia Hamm, and she isn’t anywhere on this list. Don't these people have any idea what they're doing?”

Nevertheless, the World Cup will proceed as planned with the first matches scheduled for Friday, June 9. FIFA president Sepp Blatter said he is “very confident” that the tournament be a success.

“The World Cup of Football is an extremely popular event that has been around for years – decades, actually,” said Blatter. “We’re confident that it’s going to be a success. Furthermore, we did not steal the idea from the World Baseball Classic. Our tournament has actually been around a lot longer. Our players are internationally recognized. And yes, Sepp Blatter is my real name. I did not make it up.”

Though baseball officials have offered to send representatives to Germany to assist in the running of the World Cup, Blatter has stubbornly refused.

“Hey, good luck to him,” said Fehr. “If he wants to be all cocky and stubborn that’s his problem. I just hope nothing comes up, because if it does, he won’t be able to call old Donnie Fehr for help. You made your bed, Mr. Blotter, and now you have to sleep in it.”

  Copyright 2006, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.

Copyright 2005, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.