Reggie Bush Now Projected As High Third Round Pick

LOS ANGELES--After a dismal performance in the Rose Bowl, USC running back Reggie Bush’s stock plummeted drastically, and he is now considered a high third round pick in next April’s draft. As recently as a week ago, he was expected go first.

“Reggie Bush absolutely killed his draft prospects with that performance in the Rose Bowl,” said draft guru Mel Kiper. “He’s obviously not the player we thought he was. He’s actually rather ordinary. So he’s fast. Big deal? He can’t run inside and makes stupid, boneheaded plays. If I were a GM, I might take chance on him with a third round pick. Anything higher than that and you're flushing your money down the toilet.”

Bush’s nightmarish game was epitomized by a blunder he made in the first quarter. With USC deep in Texas territory, he inexplicably attempted a lateral, which was pounced on by a member of the Texas defense. The bizarre play proved once and for all the Bush is nothing more than an overhyped, underskilled failure

“Loser. That’s the word that comes to mind,” said an NFC scout who was at the game. “Did you see the way he hit those holes? Oh, sorry, he didn’t. He actually ran away from them because he was afraid of the defenders. Lendale White, now there’s a guy who can play for my team any day of the week. He’s got it all. He’s much more NFL ready. As for Bush, I’d say he’s the second coming of Maurice Clarett. Hey, if you see him in a dark alley, cover your wallet.”

The Rose Bowl went so bad for Bush that even his coach, Pete Carroll, gave up on him. Carroll kept Bush on the sidelines during several key plays, including a game-deciding fourth down. Afterwards, he blamed Bush for the team’s loss.

“Clearly we would’ve won this game if our playmaker, Reggie Bush, had brought his ‘A’ game,” said Carroll, whose team lost for the first time in 35 games. “I don’t know what happened. Apparently he’s a fraud. Thank God that he's going to the NFL next year. I'm sure some idiot will pick him up and pay him millions of dollars. All I can say to them is 'buyer beware.'”

One person did come to Bush’s defense, however: quarterback Matt Leinart. Leinart pointed out that Bush actually performed fairly well in the game, amassing a total of 279 yards, and said Bush’s biggest problem was the burden of high expectations.

Said Leinart: “It’s easy for us to sit here and criticize, but if you’re Reggie Bush and you’ve got all those expectations on your shoulders, it’s pretty hard to live up to that. He played good out there. He gave it his best effort. Frankly, I blame myself for the loss. Eating all those pot brownies before the game really screwed me up for some reason.”

With Bush tumbling down the draft board, the Houston Texans have been forced to rethink their own strategy. They hold the number one pick and were planning to use it on the USC star until he committed career suicide in the Rose Bowl. GM Charlie Casserly admitted that the draft process just got a bit more complicated.

“Whew that one threw us for a loop. I had no idea Bush was that’s bad. On the upside, at least we found out about it last week instead of next year after we signed him. You know what the funny thing is about all this? We actually lost that game against the 49ers on purpose. What a waste of time that was. That just proves you should never lose a game on purpose unless you’re absolutely positive you want that top guy. Otherwise it’s just unethical.”

The Texans already have a young starting quarterback in David Carr, Casserly noted, and are looking to build a team around him.

“We’re sticking with David at quarterback. What we want to do is get him some protection, get him some weapons, and hopefully shore up our defense a bit as well. Don’t get me wrong. We love Vince Young. It’s just that it’s not an area of need for us right now. And Matt Leinart? Well, he looked pretty good in the Rose Bowl, but I was not overly impressed. What was up with him in the first half? He looked half asleep. I haven’t anyone that lost-looking since my old college buddy ate all those pot brownies.”