NEW YORK--Move over, Yankees. The New York Mets just signed a 20-year sponsorship agreement with Citigroup, Inc, one of the largest banks in the entire world. The blockbuster deal has New Yorkers buzzing, particularly Mets fans, who can’t help but gloat about being associated with such a prestigious financial services company.

“Wow. Citigroup, Inc. Take that, Yankees. Take that, rest of the league,” said Mets season ticket holder Gregg Schaub, 37. “It’s probably wrong to be so boastful and rub everyone’s nose in it, but there aren’t a lot of teams in this league that can say they’re aligned with a financial services company of this caliber. There are a lot of banks out there, but none that provide the diverse array of products and services that Citigroup does. I just wish they could start the sponsorship agreement this year, so we wouldn’t have to be associated with that nobody loser, William Shea, for another second.”

Citigroup paid $20 million to secure the naming rights to the Mets new stadium. It is currently the largest amount ever paid for stadium naming rights, topping the $10 million a year that the Houston Texans receive from Reliant Energy.

For Mets fans, the new deal is a dream come true.

“As soon as I heard they were building a new stadium, the first thing I said was ‘Which bank is it going to be named after?’” said Jimmy Franchi, 35, a Queens resident who has been attending Mets games since he was 12. “I was hoping they wouldn’t say Citizens Bank, because that name’s already taken and it’s kind of a homo bank anyway, and I was praying it wouldn’t be PNC because the Pirates field is named after PNC. So when they said Citigroup I almost went through the roof. Then I called my friend, who is a Yankees fan, and was like ‘Hey, what titan of the banking industry is your new stadium going to be named after?’ He just hung up on me. I guess I should just get used to people being insanely jealous.”

Mets fans are also excited by the name of the new stadium: Citifield.

“That’s a great name,” said Franchi. “It screams ‘baseball’ yet it also screams ‘global banking conglomerate.’ Very clever, I must say. And the cool thing is that the Citigroup logo is going to be plastered all over the place, so whenever opposing teams show up, they’ll know they’re dealing with a world class organization, because nothing says ‘class’ like a corporate logo affixed on the wall above a urinal.”

On Monday, Mayor Michael Bloomberg, Governor George Pataki and other dignitaries gathered for the formal groundbreaking of Citifield. In addition to the politicians, Mets players David Wright, Jose Reyes, and John Maine also participated. The joyous ceremony marked the beginning of a new era for the Mets and their fans.

“Today we break ground on the new Citifield Field. I mean ‘Citifield,’” said Mayor Bloomberg. “Today is the culmination of months of hard work on the part of our friends at Citigroup, the Mets organization, and the people of New York. This is the beginning of a beautiful friendship that will benefit everybody involved. The Mets get much-needed revenue for the next 20 years, Citigroup gets brand recognition, and the fans get a sense of civic pride at being associated with a large, faceless corporation, and…well, that’s it, basically. You get to be Citigroup’s bitches.”

Citigroup CEO Charles Prince called the 20-year agreement an “historic partnership” and said his company was honored to be associated with a team with such a rich history and loyal fan base.

“This historic partnership will benefit both Citigroup, Inc and the New York Mets and their fans,” Prince said on Monday. “The response from the fans so far has been everything I expected and more. They are clearly dazzled by the fact that we have more than 200 million customers in 100 different countries, and that we offer a wide variety of products, services, and programs designed to maximizing our clients’ personal wealth. We’re sort of like the ’86 Mets, in the sense that we do a little bit of everything, we have a can-do attitude, and we will crush anybody who gets in our way.”

Copyright 2006, The Brushback - Do not reprint without permission. This article is satire and is not intended as actual news.